Just an ordinary day

The girls are running around with 2 balloons tied together between their legs. I sharpied a horse's head on the front balloon and they're screaming "Narnia and the North!!!" while running around chasing each other.

Lexie had nutella all over her face. I told her "Go look at your face!" She said, like it should be obvious "I CAN'T look at my face, Mommy. My eyeballs are on my face." I told her that's what mirrors are for.

Angelina wants me to teach her balloon duck language and asked me if I know it. I said "Sure, Quack QUACK quack quack." She said "NO they say (singing) 'Everyone wants to be a duck DUCK DUCK!" Oh wait, it wasn't her balloon (I'm obviously not keeping up) it was the duck on a stick with little wheels and flappy feet.

Annabelle has started picking up sign language really quickly as she signed mouse after only seeing it once at the pet store. Of course we apply it to ferret, rat, and any small furry thing that looks like it could have been related to mice in the evolutionary process.

Lexie, who's 3 going on 35, picked up a lunch bag full of school supplies. "Mommy, this is DREADFULLY heavy."

Anne Leaves

Wow. We've been so blessed to have an au pair for a year. In this last year, I really don't quite know how we'd have gotten along without her. We managed the move from California to Virginia, but while in Virginia she was SOOO important. I was able to handle a lot of Annabelle's appointments, have dates with each kid. Simple things like walking Ina to school without having the other two along. Taking Lexie to the Smithsonian while Ina was at school and Annabelle was napping. Sitting in the skeleton room with Lexie on my lap making up the "Wally the Whale who wanted a wife and wandered the world wondering where she was" story. Getting a haircut. The kids got to do crafts and walk barefoot in the creek and poke dead things with sticks. While I'm perfectly willing to poke LIVE things with sticks, we wouldn't have been able to walk in the creek as I had Annabelle in the stroller. Annabelle got so many of her extra therapy hours from Anne. It's due to her that she can handle stairs safely.

And now as I drove away from the airport, I thought I'm losing a good friend. What a special bond it is to be able to look over the heads of your kids when they do something funny or silly or cute or irritating and share that with another grown up who you know also loves these funny, silly, cute and irritating kids.

I had to hold Angelina for her to get to sleep last night. She was completely beside herself. Lexie was looking to Ina for clues as to how to handle it and mustered up several sniffles.

I have all the skills to get our family happy again (at least the kids, I suspect Doug's going to be a tougher nut to crack). I have to look at all the things I have to be grateful for. That we had her for a year. That I have the kids to comfort me. That now we'll be back to being a little constellation of humans that sticks together through thick and thin. That I won't have to share Annabelle, although I'm also so grateful that Anne was truly worthy of sharing Annabelle with.

How to cope -- get up at 6:00 a.m. every day and have some time for chores or studying or working out.
-- keep the kids busy, but be open to their grief.
-- plan a visit at Christmas
-- get back to the business of being a happy, silly mom.